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Queenie Goldstein loves her sister more than anyone in the whole, wide world; she really, really does. There's nobody who knows her better, nobody who can read her so well without actually poking into her thoughts, no one she'd rather share an apartment or piece of pie or fully-belly laugh with. She's an absolute peach. The best.

It's just that, well, sometimes Queenie really wishes Tina was a tiny, wee bit less uptight.

Take today. It's Valentine's Day -- Hearts and flowers, romance and candy, and they've been fighting about it for an entire week. That's not an exaggeration; Queenie remembers the exact moment it started, because it was the very same day she told Percival she wanted to cook him dinner.

Percival, of course, being Tina's old boss, meaning the boss who demoted her, meaning it's kind of understandable that Tina's a little miffed that he's taken a shine to Queenie. Tina feels betrayed -- It's practically written up in lights in her mind, and Queenie can't help but see it even when she's tried not to because Tina's snapped at her. And she'd feel worse about it if she couldn't also see, just clear as day, that Tina knows it's not really Percival's fault, that Tina'd broken the actual, bona fide law, a really big one, and that there was a whole council of people who gave her the ax because, well, she'd done magic in front of a No-Maj, actually on a No-Maj, and they couldn't exactly let that slide.

But gosh, Queenie's been getting an earful for a week, Tina suddenly a fierce guardian of her sister's chastity, which is pretty silly since Queenie lost track of it at sixteen. Do you know what it'll look like, you alone at his house? she'd insisted, her face going all sour and puckered up when Queenie had replied, That I'm making him dinner?

So now Percival is coming to their place. It doesn't make a lick of sense to Queenie, but she knows better than to look a gift horse in the mouth, even if it means he's got to sneak past the landlady. She even bought Tina a ticket to a variety show, with an extra so she could take a friend if she wanted, the show with the Cackling Choir and Lady Mim and some acts that are a real gas, and it oughta take at least four hours.

Gosh, she really hopes it takes at least four hours.

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Queenie Goldstein

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